August 10, 1968
by Janine Stephenson
Becca said that Craig said that Ron might want to ask me out. I told her to tell Craig to tell him that when he makes up his mind, to be certain about it. Fear is not an aphrodisiac.
Really, I've never met a man who is so powerful and yet, so powerfully weak. Ron can walk into a room and take command. He can talk to powerful people, like The Senator, directly. He can hob-nob with rich people comfortably. But he has to ask me out through my friends? How awful!
It makes me respect Benjamin more, in hindsight. Now that I think about it, Benjamin must have been very nervous asking a white girl out. He had no idea if I was a bigot or not. I could've been terribly insulting for all he knew. But if he was afraid, he never let on. I was proud to stand by his side, regardless of what anyone else thought about it.
I miss him. It makes me sad.
Besides, I don't understand Ron's fear of asking me out. I see him with girls all the time. They drape themselves all over him. Maybe his nerves are really a trick to make me chase him. Maybe he thinks that by appearing weak, I'll want to take care of him. Or something like that. Well, he couldn't be any more wrong. If he wants to ask me out, then he needs to do it directly.
Becca says that I've misunderstood the situation. But I don't think so. A girl wants a boy to be a man. It's the least he could be.
While I'm at it, I'm still not over that George McGovern. He's a louse of the worst order. It makes me want to work 22 hours for The Senator, just so we can teach that man a lesson. You can talk peace all want, but if you're a jerk talking peace then you're also a big phony.
Tonight being Saturday night, I figured that I would watch television and maybe read a book. Becca would rather I go to a coffeehouse with her and Craig. I hate being a third wheel, but she says that being a third wheel is far better than being a drag.
